I've been hitting the gym HARD people. Been there 14 times in 24 days and I've GAINED 9 lbs. I do at least 45 mins. of cardio and then lift weights. What the heck! Are you kidding, this must be a joke from the evil, evil scale. Please someone tell me it's muscle and as Becka said today 'I should be beastie, if that's all muscle'....errr.
I admit to having a Xmas party EVERY Saturday night this month, baking WAY too many cookies, and vegging when I'm not at the gym. All that said. Nine pounds is 27,000 calories I consumed but did not burn off. I really don't see how THAT would be possible considering most of the 9 lbs has happened in the last 10 days. Please let this be a fluke, water retention, some mean trick by the Xmas Weight Grinch!
I will say this. I can't SEE the 9 lbs in the mirror. NONE of my clothes are fitting tight, in fact my shirts are fitting better. So I will got with the 'it's muscle' theory for now and continue my treadmill craziness.
Vent over now.
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Sunday, December 21, 2008
The Shack
WOW! What a deep and powerful read. I will apologize now for spoiling it for anyone currently reading the book or intending to!
I rarely talk about my religious beliefs because I think your walk with God is personal and a somewhat solitary journey we must take. The church I was raised in was very conservative with the red carpet, carved alter, 22 stain-glassed windows, organ and beautiful oak pews. It was established in 1845 as First Protestant Church, the first church of New Braunfels for the German refugees. A church does not feel comfortable to me without the above and I've had a VERY hard time finding one that I like here in Georgia. I choose to read religious texts, fiction or non-fiction, on my own to further my beliefs and strength in God.
In that grain, I picked up 'The Shack' about a month ago and sat down for my journey. The story is premised on a man, Mack, who has lost his daughter through abduction and murder and has sworn off his relationship with God. It slowly unfolds as his journey back to forgiveness and healing.
We've ALL been angry with God at some point in our lives, not understanding the why or how. The main character, Mack, is at this stage in his life. Mack is called back to the 'shack' where his daughter's body was found and he finds God and Jesus waiting for him to call him back to their arms.
Mack's wife has always had a deep relationship with God, whom she calls 'Papa' to signify her closeness to him. This is a turnoff for Mack because he can't understand having that kind of intimacy with an 'unknown' power or being. I can only hope to have that kind of intimacy with God one day in my life. I am constantly in awe of people with such profound outspoken faiths, but just as in awe of the strong silence that is His presence.
Through all the conversations Mack has with God he learns that his denouncement has only made God's call stronger. My belief is that we either choose to hear his call or ignore it but his heart wants us to listen. Maybe this listening just comes harder for some as we question the 'whys' that we do not understand.
The most poignant part of the story for me was when Mack, got to SEE his daughter in her heaven enjoying her time, waiting for her family. As my sister, Allison left us when she was 4, the moment struck a heartstring. Mom, dad, and me have all had this EXACT journey that Mack had. A child taken too soon. A family torn and put back together through grace and strength.
One of the beliefs that has always been with me as an adult is that God will forgive you, no matter what you've done, how long you've been gone, or what you believed before. I do not believe you have to seat yourself in a pew EVERY Sunday morning to know God or for him to know your heart. I believe that some people hide behind the label 'Christian' who are not truely living for the church. Christianity is to be a listener, loving, have goodwill, and to not judge. 'The Shack' attests to all of this. That God is waiting, not judging, and when your ready so is he.
The author makes one note that I'm still pondering on. Jesus at one point says 'I am not the church, I am not Christian'...in a way that is true he is Christ, the namesake for the religion that WE made to teach HIS lessons. Jesus in the book talks about how he came to earth to teach his father's lessons of compassion, love, forgiveness, and sacrifice his soul to show us the way. So if Jesus is NOT Christianity this means he was sent for ALL the worlds' people, each culture adapting his lessons into their own belief system. If this is TRUE then Christianity is NOT the only way to God, because by this logic God is truely THE Father of ALL earth's people, not one sector of them.
Furthermore, Jesus is not pleased that wars and conflicts are started in the name of Christianity, because he certainly didn't teach violence. And he didn't teach us to PUSH beliefs onto others by submission or threat. 'The Shack' depicts him as a silent force that will over come the walls and boundaries of human souls with a strong peace of knowing him. Because we are human, we will continue to justify actions because we think OUR way is better or right, even if we are actually going against the principles behind the label of Christian.
In the end, the journey will be both incredible and unbearable, a grasping for grace and wholeness that will end the day I leave this earth. Until then I search to find my beliefs, my road, and put my soul entwined with God's. I do not question the path I have to take, for it is MINE alone and should bear no judgment from others. I only have to judge my own journey.
I rarely talk about my religious beliefs because I think your walk with God is personal and a somewhat solitary journey we must take. The church I was raised in was very conservative with the red carpet, carved alter, 22 stain-glassed windows, organ and beautiful oak pews. It was established in 1845 as First Protestant Church, the first church of New Braunfels for the German refugees. A church does not feel comfortable to me without the above and I've had a VERY hard time finding one that I like here in Georgia. I choose to read religious texts, fiction or non-fiction, on my own to further my beliefs and strength in God.
In that grain, I picked up 'The Shack' about a month ago and sat down for my journey. The story is premised on a man, Mack, who has lost his daughter through abduction and murder and has sworn off his relationship with God. It slowly unfolds as his journey back to forgiveness and healing.
We've ALL been angry with God at some point in our lives, not understanding the why or how. The main character, Mack, is at this stage in his life. Mack is called back to the 'shack' where his daughter's body was found and he finds God and Jesus waiting for him to call him back to their arms.
Mack's wife has always had a deep relationship with God, whom she calls 'Papa' to signify her closeness to him. This is a turnoff for Mack because he can't understand having that kind of intimacy with an 'unknown' power or being. I can only hope to have that kind of intimacy with God one day in my life. I am constantly in awe of people with such profound outspoken faiths, but just as in awe of the strong silence that is His presence.
Through all the conversations Mack has with God he learns that his denouncement has only made God's call stronger. My belief is that we either choose to hear his call or ignore it but his heart wants us to listen. Maybe this listening just comes harder for some as we question the 'whys' that we do not understand.
The most poignant part of the story for me was when Mack, got to SEE his daughter in her heaven enjoying her time, waiting for her family. As my sister, Allison left us when she was 4, the moment struck a heartstring. Mom, dad, and me have all had this EXACT journey that Mack had. A child taken too soon. A family torn and put back together through grace and strength.
One of the beliefs that has always been with me as an adult is that God will forgive you, no matter what you've done, how long you've been gone, or what you believed before. I do not believe you have to seat yourself in a pew EVERY Sunday morning to know God or for him to know your heart. I believe that some people hide behind the label 'Christian' who are not truely living for the church. Christianity is to be a listener, loving, have goodwill, and to not judge. 'The Shack' attests to all of this. That God is waiting, not judging, and when your ready so is he.
The author makes one note that I'm still pondering on. Jesus at one point says 'I am not the church, I am not Christian'...in a way that is true he is Christ, the namesake for the religion that WE made to teach HIS lessons. Jesus in the book talks about how he came to earth to teach his father's lessons of compassion, love, forgiveness, and sacrifice his soul to show us the way. So if Jesus is NOT Christianity this means he was sent for ALL the worlds' people, each culture adapting his lessons into their own belief system. If this is TRUE then Christianity is NOT the only way to God, because by this logic God is truely THE Father of ALL earth's people, not one sector of them.
Furthermore, Jesus is not pleased that wars and conflicts are started in the name of Christianity, because he certainly didn't teach violence. And he didn't teach us to PUSH beliefs onto others by submission or threat. 'The Shack' depicts him as a silent force that will over come the walls and boundaries of human souls with a strong peace of knowing him. Because we are human, we will continue to justify actions because we think OUR way is better or right, even if we are actually going against the principles behind the label of Christian.
In the end, the journey will be both incredible and unbearable, a grasping for grace and wholeness that will end the day I leave this earth. Until then I search to find my beliefs, my road, and put my soul entwined with God's. I do not question the path I have to take, for it is MINE alone and should bear no judgment from others. I only have to judge my own journey.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Character Depedence...
So, I really don't like 'character' items...tshirts, cups, hats, plates...you name it I just don't see the point. Rich has gotten used to me saying 'It was a cute outfit, then I spotted the stupid Pooh' It is true, Winnie the Pooh takes the brunt of my dislike, for which I cannot explain. But then again I was not raised with videos, movies, or much television.
Where is this all going you say! Observing how much toddlers are dependent on their 'characters' as friends. EVERY THING has to be about Pooh, Dora, Barbie, Spiderman, Cars...you get the point. What happened to imagination? More and more I see kiddos reliant on entertainment from their tv friends, refusing sippies that don't have the 'right' character, coloring books must be a certain cartoon.
Seriously, there are tantrums happening over these things and parents are giving in. What happened to being the adult and kids learning about disappointment. Or have we just become a nation so 'tired' from the stresses that we give in.
So I have declared war on this dependence and am trying to instill an imagination in Nora. She's only allowed 1 hr of tv per day, although there a couple days a week when that 's a little more. We color, play with blocks, do playdough, and soon I'll introduce paint!
Where is this all going you say! Observing how much toddlers are dependent on their 'characters' as friends. EVERY THING has to be about Pooh, Dora, Barbie, Spiderman, Cars...you get the point. What happened to imagination? More and more I see kiddos reliant on entertainment from their tv friends, refusing sippies that don't have the 'right' character, coloring books must be a certain cartoon.
Seriously, there are tantrums happening over these things and parents are giving in. What happened to being the adult and kids learning about disappointment. Or have we just become a nation so 'tired' from the stresses that we give in.
So I have declared war on this dependence and am trying to instill an imagination in Nora. She's only allowed 1 hr of tv per day, although there a couple days a week when that 's a little more. We color, play with blocks, do playdough, and soon I'll introduce paint!
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Nora News
SO Cute!
She tried to 'play' with Phebs this week. She took a small stuffed frog and dropped it on the ground next to Phebs, then squatted and stared at the kitty. Phebs didn't 'play' so she did it again. This time when Phebs didn't respond she yelled in frustration and did it for a third time...then gave up
Rich told me this one since I was asleep when it happened. She was downstairs getting breakfast and after breakfast went to the fridge. She pointed at the fridge and told Rich 'Jewjew' That her word for juice. Absolutely AWESOME that she is now communicating her needs!
Rich told me this one as well, I was at the gym. He was playing on the computer and she wanted 'up'...So he put Nora in his lap. There was a VERY small picture of me on Facebook. Nora said 'mama', Rich asked 'where's mama'...she pointed at the little picture on the screen! Now if only I had been here! She hardly EVER says mama, it's always about 'dada'
She tried to 'play' with Phebs this week. She took a small stuffed frog and dropped it on the ground next to Phebs, then squatted and stared at the kitty. Phebs didn't 'play' so she did it again. This time when Phebs didn't respond she yelled in frustration and did it for a third time...then gave up
Rich told me this one since I was asleep when it happened. She was downstairs getting breakfast and after breakfast went to the fridge. She pointed at the fridge and told Rich 'Jewjew' That her word for juice. Absolutely AWESOME that she is now communicating her needs!
Rich told me this one as well, I was at the gym. He was playing on the computer and she wanted 'up'...So he put Nora in his lap. There was a VERY small picture of me on Facebook. Nora said 'mama', Rich asked 'where's mama'...she pointed at the little picture on the screen! Now if only I had been here! She hardly EVER says mama, it's always about 'dada'
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
I don't hug...sorry
I've done a LOT of reflection since becoming a mom and have come to the realization that I don't hug people. And it's not intentional, done out of spite, or hatred to those around me.
I think all personality traits are formed by your upbringing, what you saw, heard, learned, etc....My parents came from very strict German households, a culture that back then was more focused on work and succeeding than rearing touchy, feely children.
My paternal grandfather was raised by his single mother with his brother. My great grandfather died of the influenze pandemic of 1918, he caught it while nursing his own father. Both men died leaving their wives alone to raise children and get through the Depression. I've observed my now 89 yr. old grandfather enough through the years to see the stiff hugs, buck up attitude to know emotionally where my father came from. My dad has worked HARD to show my sister and I affection and love beyond what his father did.
My maternal grandmother was raised by her single mom with her sister. My great grandfather died of a heart attack at the age of 36, yes, 36 yrs old. My grandmother was 10 and her sister 7. So, my mom grew up with a mommy that also didn't know two sided parental love. Or have roll models for that. Once again my mother has worked hard to fixed the past through her daughters.
I am very blessed to have the parents that I do. For them to realize where they came from and what their children needed, that was not present for them. I got hugs growing up, don't get me wrong. I just have to be REALLY close to you to extend those arms of friendship. The people I hug the most are blood relatives or people that I've known ALL my life. You know those family friends that might as well be blood because they know all your secrets anyways.
I'm sitting here trying to think of the 50+ friends Rich and I have here in Atlanta. I think I've hugged maybe 6. Which makes me sort of sad and mad at myself. What must all of you be thinking! That I'm cold, don't care. The fact of the matter is that I do, be patient with me as I get over some hurdles in my life.
This all being said. That is where I come from. That is my emotional history.
I think all personality traits are formed by your upbringing, what you saw, heard, learned, etc....My parents came from very strict German households, a culture that back then was more focused on work and succeeding than rearing touchy, feely children.
My paternal grandfather was raised by his single mother with his brother. My great grandfather died of the influenze pandemic of 1918, he caught it while nursing his own father. Both men died leaving their wives alone to raise children and get through the Depression. I've observed my now 89 yr. old grandfather enough through the years to see the stiff hugs, buck up attitude to know emotionally where my father came from. My dad has worked HARD to show my sister and I affection and love beyond what his father did.
My maternal grandmother was raised by her single mom with her sister. My great grandfather died of a heart attack at the age of 36, yes, 36 yrs old. My grandmother was 10 and her sister 7. So, my mom grew up with a mommy that also didn't know two sided parental love. Or have roll models for that. Once again my mother has worked hard to fixed the past through her daughters.
I am very blessed to have the parents that I do. For them to realize where they came from and what their children needed, that was not present for them. I got hugs growing up, don't get me wrong. I just have to be REALLY close to you to extend those arms of friendship. The people I hug the most are blood relatives or people that I've known ALL my life. You know those family friends that might as well be blood because they know all your secrets anyways.
I'm sitting here trying to think of the 50+ friends Rich and I have here in Atlanta. I think I've hugged maybe 6. Which makes me sort of sad and mad at myself. What must all of you be thinking! That I'm cold, don't care. The fact of the matter is that I do, be patient with me as I get over some hurdles in my life.
This all being said. That is where I come from. That is my emotional history.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
The great Christmas Debate
Rich and I had this problem last year, what do you get an infant for Christmas? They don't even realize the meaning of the day or the traditions behind the celebration.
Last year we decided to start her college fund as her gift, because what would be a better gift for her in the future?!
This year we were stumped for a while, until we went to Texas in early November. Nora discovered dad's sand horseshoe pits! Much fun was had...see video evidence here.
The "hunt" was ON! We decided to go simple and found a great little ladybug sandbox online. Cost a whopping $40, plus shipping. What a DEAL!
I think we are undecided on whether or not she'll have to wait for the gift or not. But seeing as it's so cold for the next few month I can't imagine her using it much. Maybe as an indoor ball pit until spring? OOOOH, that could be fun. Might have to hit the thrift stores for cheap balls......
Last year we decided to start her college fund as her gift, because what would be a better gift for her in the future?!
This year we were stumped for a while, until we went to Texas in early November. Nora discovered dad's sand horseshoe pits! Much fun was had...see video evidence here.
The "hunt" was ON! We decided to go simple and found a great little ladybug sandbox online. Cost a whopping $40, plus shipping. What a DEAL!
I think we are undecided on whether or not she'll have to wait for the gift or not. But seeing as it's so cold for the next few month I can't imagine her using it much. Maybe as an indoor ball pit until spring? OOOOH, that could be fun. Might have to hit the thrift stores for cheap balls......
Nora News
Words
Cheese - ChEEEEE
Bottle - baba
NiteNite - Nienie
Shoes - SHOOOO
Nora has also started 'finding' her tummy.....
Me: Nora where's your tummy
Nora pats tummy
Me: Nora show mama your tummy
Nora picks up shirt puts finger in belly button, giggles. SO sweet!
Foods - She really likes kiwi and rice cake. This week she ate a WHOLE kiwi with breakfast everyday. I'm SO glad she's an adventurous little eater! Although it may change with time it's nice for now.
Qtip Queen.
Nora is now tall enough to reach into our up most bathroom drawers. Last week she discovered the Qtips. ERRRRRR. She thinks they are GREAT! So, every morning she grabs qtips out of the drawer, comes into the bedroom, and proceeds to stuff them between the matress and box springs one at a time. Giggle,....repeat process....
Cheese - ChEEEEE
Bottle - baba
NiteNite - Nienie
Shoes - SHOOOO
Nora has also started 'finding' her tummy.....
Me: Nora where's your tummy
Nora pats tummy
Me: Nora show mama your tummy
Nora picks up shirt puts finger in belly button, giggles. SO sweet!
Foods - She really likes kiwi and rice cake. This week she ate a WHOLE kiwi with breakfast everyday. I'm SO glad she's an adventurous little eater! Although it may change with time it's nice for now.
Qtip Queen.
Nora is now tall enough to reach into our up most bathroom drawers. Last week she discovered the Qtips. ERRRRRR. She thinks they are GREAT! So, every morning she grabs qtips out of the drawer, comes into the bedroom, and proceeds to stuff them between the matress and box springs one at a time. Giggle,....repeat process....
Thursday, November 27, 2008
New Words
Forgot to post about Nora's newest accomplishments.
Words - Thank you(DAT DO)
No - only in reference to food or toys, not in defiance(yet)
Nana - as in her grandma
Food - We now feed ourselves yogurt WITH a spoon!
Teeth - Cut tooth #5 on November 4th....errr, will she EVER have molars.
Bath - This started a couple months ago. You say, " Nora, it's splashy time, splashy time" She walks/runs down the hall to her bathroom and turns right...We normally find her squealing next to the tub.
Words - Thank you(DAT DO)
No - only in reference to food or toys, not in defiance(yet)
Nana - as in her grandma
Food - We now feed ourselves yogurt WITH a spoon!
Teeth - Cut tooth #5 on November 4th....errr, will she EVER have molars.
Bath - This started a couple months ago. You say, " Nora, it's splashy time, splashy time" She walks/runs down the hall to her bathroom and turns right...We normally find her squealing next to the tub.
What is in a name?
Just so everyone that might read this knows, Rich and I are in NO way pregnant or thinking about trying! At least not for another year....
Ok, that said. We still dream about our next child and what he/she will become. In that same thread, we bounce ideas of each other from time to time....
Conversation from this week...
Me: Hey, I heard a girl name I want to throw by you.
Rich: Ok, shoot
Me: Lynleigh, it's actually an English boys name but I don't care about that
Rich: Yeah, I like it. Sort of a girly boys name!
Me: I was thinking that since my mom's name is Jacquelyn and Cari's middle name is Lynn the baby would have a family name. I guess we could pair it with Jean, since that's your mom and sister's middle name.
Rich: Lynleigh Jean, that might work.
So, next girl baby may actually have a name YEARS out from her actual arrival. Of course we have to ask Jen for permission since it's her 'namesake' to pass on. We aren't sure if Jen and Dave are done having kiddos and wouldn't want to take that from them.
We of course are reserving our right to change our minds.
FYI: We have potential boy names as well. ( no stealing! jk)
*Ford Alexander
*Grant Thomas
Ok, that said. We still dream about our next child and what he/she will become. In that same thread, we bounce ideas of each other from time to time....
Conversation from this week...
Me: Hey, I heard a girl name I want to throw by you.
Rich: Ok, shoot
Me: Lynleigh, it's actually an English boys name but I don't care about that
Rich: Yeah, I like it. Sort of a girly boys name!
Me: I was thinking that since my mom's name is Jacquelyn and Cari's middle name is Lynn the baby would have a family name. I guess we could pair it with Jean, since that's your mom and sister's middle name.
Rich: Lynleigh Jean, that might work.
So, next girl baby may actually have a name YEARS out from her actual arrival. Of course we have to ask Jen for permission since it's her 'namesake' to pass on. We aren't sure if Jen and Dave are done having kiddos and wouldn't want to take that from them.
We of course are reserving our right to change our minds.
FYI: We have potential boy names as well. ( no stealing! jk)
*Ford Alexander
*Grant Thomas
Friday, November 21, 2008
Love Letters
Project - Clean out the closet! At my parent's house that is.....better said...An Inventory of my Life...
Amongst the inventory I found a manilla envelope containing most, if not ALL of the love letters from my first boyfriend. Started dating him when I was 18. What can I say, late bloomer here!
It was fascinating to look at myself, on paper, 12-13 yrs later. All the hopes and dreams and promises of forever that the first flush of love brings. We dealt with a lot in those months, his terminal illness, family deaths, separation, more illness....sort of unfair for teenagers to have to swallow. But we swallowed it and helped each other along. I once read that there are 3 kinds of 'friends'
Ones that stay your entire life
Ones who come in and out of your life
Ones that are there to shape one part of your life then leave forever
I think first loves must be there to show you the road for a while, all the highs and lows and then disappear. Maybe that's why they say first love dies hard. It all your firsts, secrets, and soul given to one person that you trusted til the ends of earth. You will always wonder where they are, how there doing, and if they remember too. Love changes things for sure because after that first heartbreak, I think you become more cautious and closed the next time around. I realized in those letters how much that 16 mth relationship forever shaped the ones that followed.
Changes in me. Changes in how I trusted. laughed. cared. smiled. talked. opened up. viewed life.
Amongst the inventory I found a manilla envelope containing most, if not ALL of the love letters from my first boyfriend. Started dating him when I was 18. What can I say, late bloomer here!
It was fascinating to look at myself, on paper, 12-13 yrs later. All the hopes and dreams and promises of forever that the first flush of love brings. We dealt with a lot in those months, his terminal illness, family deaths, separation, more illness....sort of unfair for teenagers to have to swallow. But we swallowed it and helped each other along. I once read that there are 3 kinds of 'friends'
Ones that stay your entire life
Ones who come in and out of your life
Ones that are there to shape one part of your life then leave forever
I think first loves must be there to show you the road for a while, all the highs and lows and then disappear. Maybe that's why they say first love dies hard. It all your firsts, secrets, and soul given to one person that you trusted til the ends of earth. You will always wonder where they are, how there doing, and if they remember too. Love changes things for sure because after that first heartbreak, I think you become more cautious and closed the next time around. I realized in those letters how much that 16 mth relationship forever shaped the ones that followed.
Changes in me. Changes in how I trusted. laughed. cared. smiled. talked. opened up. viewed life.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Margaritas and laughs
So, I haven't been "out" with girlfriends since Nora was born. I know, I know...pitiful!
Went out last night with a group of six ladies to celebrate an acquaintance's 32nd birthday. Acquaintance being Gretchen. It was great finally meeting a group of mommy's that live like Rich and I! At least in the sense that they shop at Goodwill, consignment stores, hate the mall, clip coupons, and live on budgets. I've long realized that a downfall of living in East Cobb is the societal expectations that live here. Despite appearances I'm not into having super expensive furniture and decorations. Shoot I have trouble paying over $20 for a pair of jeans!
The night was a GREAT time. With Gretchen ending up in the bathroom. Poor thing, 120 lbs gets taken down quickly by margaritas...I swear she had like 2.5!
Nora news-
New words this morning..."out" and "juice"
Went out last night with a group of six ladies to celebrate an acquaintance's 32nd birthday. Acquaintance being Gretchen. It was great finally meeting a group of mommy's that live like Rich and I! At least in the sense that they shop at Goodwill, consignment stores, hate the mall, clip coupons, and live on budgets. I've long realized that a downfall of living in East Cobb is the societal expectations that live here. Despite appearances I'm not into having super expensive furniture and decorations. Shoot I have trouble paying over $20 for a pair of jeans!
The night was a GREAT time. With Gretchen ending up in the bathroom. Poor thing, 120 lbs gets taken down quickly by margaritas...I swear she had like 2.5!
Nora news-
New words this morning..."out" and "juice"
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
1 Year ago today
Annora's Birth Story - born Oct. 20th, 2007
Friday October 19th
Felt tired and drained all morning while working around the house. I was having some strong Braxton Hicks contractions all morning and into the afternoon. My sister called at about 3pm and I remember telling her I felt 'achy' all over. Since my membranes had been stripped on Thursday, I was starting to wonder if the 'contractions' could be the start of labor. I decided to go on a walk at about 4:30pm to see if this got anything started, but NO things remained the same.
Rich and I had Jonathan and Becca over for dinner and a movie that night. I had been craving a Buffalo Chicken Pizza from Johnny's so the guys went out and picked it up. I really wasn't hungry at all during dinner and only ate about 1 ½ slices...not normal.
They left at about 11pm and I was just exhausted so I went to bed.
Saturday October 20th – her due date
2am – woken up by strong contraction – This had happened the weekend before so I really thought nothing of it and went back to bed. Rich was playing video games in the bonus room and I harassed him about coming to bed. My thought was, 'Get some sleep, if this happens soon you need rest too!'
3am – woken by another contraction
3:40am – woken by the 3rd contraction – at this point I decided to just get out of bed and come downstairs and play on the computer.
The contractions continued to get closer together but were really randomly spaced, 10mins, 14 mins, 20 mins, 7 mins. I read every section on labor in my pregnancy books and decided that it had to be false labor....I crawled back into bed with Rich around 9 am and told him that I'd been having contractions but was convinced it was a false alarm. Rich woke up and pulled out a crossword to work while we continued to time them...So there we were solving word puzzles...
10am – get out of bed to go to the bathroom, comment to Rich that I feel like I'm peeing myself everytime I have a contraction. Rich laughs at this because I'd peed myself several times during the pregnancy from sneezing. That and I have a really sharp pain under my right rib cage, hindsight 20/20 she probably ruptured the sac at that point.
10:15 – Having to breathe through contractions and Rich suggests I take a shower 'just in case'
10:38 – Get out of shower after having about 3-4 contractions and decide this is probably it. Call Doctor's answering service and say I 'think' my water broke. Doctor says to come on in to the hospital to get checked.
12pm – Arrive at hospital, get checked in maternity triage – 3.5cm dilated, 100% effaced, +1 station.
I will note at this point that triage was 'empty' when I got there, no nursing staff to be found. Rich was downstairs on the main floor of the hospital checking me in so I was all alone.
1:30pm – We get moved to a room on the ward. My hospital anxiety takes over at this point. The contractions are getting stronger and I just can't keep myself calm. Rich is also showing a lot of worry and his eyes tear up when I'm in pain. Decide to get epidural to help both of us out.
2pm – Get epidural – hooray! Sweet relief and a nap! Since I'd gone to bed at 1am I was already exhausted.
6:30 pm – Dr. Alarcon comes in to check on me. He looks at my contraction pattern and is like 'whoa, we may have to slow that pitocin drip, your contractions are every 1 min.' I wasn't on pitocin. He decides to check me and finds I'm only at 5cm! After 6.5 hrs, I've only progressed 1.5cm and she's gone back UP to a 0 station!
7:00pm - Dr. Alarcon decided to insert an internal contraction monitor to better test the contraction strength. We find out I'm having 1 productive contraction for every 3-4 I'm having....Ugh! So, we start pitocin. At this point I ask for a little more epidural because I'm feeling cramping through my current dose and I know that Pitocin makes STRONG contractions.....
7:45 pm – Comment to Rich that I've started to feel cramping only on my right side again and it's getting stronger! Nurse flips me to my right side to see if the epidural meds will run to that side of my spine to numb me....yeah, you're suppose to flip from side to side every 15 minutes for an hour after getting an epi...The nurse FORGOT!!!!
8:00pm – Anesthesiologist arrives and I'm crying through contractions at this point. Our best guess is that I'm in transition(8-10) centimeters and feeling ALL of it on my right side. Anesthesiologist gives me a double dose to kill off the pain....oh, I felt sooooo much better
Proceed to get the shakes from the epidural, like chills but you're not cold.
8:30pm – Dr. Alarcon comes to check – COMPLETE! +2 station. Well, hooray, I'm numb....Dr. has to go do csection and will be back in a bit. With me numb and a first time mom the nurse/doctor assume it will take a while to push this baby out. Little do they know.....
8:45pm – Still having the shakes and start feeling nauseous...throw up olive green bile. Yeah, I feel REALLY sexy at this point! But better non the less....
8:55pm – Feeling really full in the pelvis despite the numbness. Rich goes and gets the nurse.
9:00pm, - Nurse and Rich flip me to my back. Nurse sets up stirrups. She then looks at the heart monitors and calls down the hall on her cell – 'Um, I need some help down here' Four nurses come into my room and start flipping me from side to side.
9:05pm – Annora has descended FAST, heartrate up at 200+ and she's crowning. Every nurse is calling their doctor on the ward as mine is still in a csection! Oxygen mask is on my face at this point and I'm told to breath deep.
9:10pm - Doctor Mary Lanham-Chapel walks in to deliver baby (background, I 'fired' her as my OB about 4 years ago for refusing to believe I had a hormone issue, calling me 'fat', and not prescribing a diaphragm like I wanted)
9:10pm - Started pushing, since I was numb tried to visualize what that would feel like. Rich was on my right side holding my right leg back and talking me through things.... About 7 pushes later and with the use of a small suction cup....
9:20pm - Annora arrived! And Dr. Alarcon walked in 2 mins later from the CSection
Sunday, October 12, 2008
5 Years
5 Years ago we got married - October 11th, 2003. Things I remember from my wedding day
- No sleeping the night before
- getting up super early and crying reading a letter my dad wrote to me
- going to the hall to decorate and wrap the Maypole
- Watching the ran start to fall, all 9" of it!
- Wishing my Granny and Bepaw were there.
- Being overwhelmed walking down the aisle and seeing Rich waiting for me.
- Almost passing out as we entered the reception
- Dancing with my dad, who rerecorded a song for me as a surprise.
- Leaving the reception in the rain, having Dan and Angela drive us to Austin that night
- Rich looking at me and saying 'I love you, my WIFE' for the first time......
Our first meal on our honeymoon was at an Italian bistro in San Francisco. We split a pizza and a salad. Last night 5 yrs later we had pizza together, with our daughter, Nora.....We came full circle.
- No sleeping the night before
- getting up super early and crying reading a letter my dad wrote to me
- going to the hall to decorate and wrap the Maypole
- Watching the ran start to fall, all 9" of it!
- Wishing my Granny and Bepaw were there.
- Being overwhelmed walking down the aisle and seeing Rich waiting for me.
- Almost passing out as we entered the reception
- Dancing with my dad, who rerecorded a song for me as a surprise.
- Leaving the reception in the rain, having Dan and Angela drive us to Austin that night
- Rich looking at me and saying 'I love you, my WIFE' for the first time......
Our first meal on our honeymoon was at an Italian bistro in San Francisco. We split a pizza and a salad. Last night 5 yrs later we had pizza together, with our daughter, Nora.....We came full circle.
Friday, October 3, 2008
Work
Yah, I know not a creative title...but it's Friday night and I'm tired after a long week.
Status update on Willman Design Studio.
Put a random ad in a neighborhood newsletter and got called by Dogwood Landscaping. SO, glad this happened since it started a little boom of business for me. Not bad in an economic meltdown month. I've been super busy, but very content.
Work makes me happy and not the housework, mommy title type. I'm going to blame this on my German heritage and the work hard, play hard, save money traits that come with it.
Status update on Willman Design Studio.
Put a random ad in a neighborhood newsletter and got called by Dogwood Landscaping. SO, glad this happened since it started a little boom of business for me. Not bad in an economic meltdown month. I've been super busy, but very content.
Work makes me happy and not the housework, mommy title type. I'm going to blame this on my German heritage and the work hard, play hard, save money traits that come with it.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Landlines and Cellphones
What a racket this is! Budgeting cutting efforts again here. Rich and I realized that between the two we were paying WAY too much per year on phones.
So, we called Bellsouth, cut off the caller ID, call waiting, and something else I can't remember. But it cut the bill down by $35 a month....This is just exciting news in this house.
Then, we got to Sprint, to see about that bill....Come to find out we can't reduce our bill. In fact, when our service runs out we will be forced into a 'bundle package' that will increase our bill. "Bundling" is suppose to SAVE money!!!!! Our only option is to get rid of Rich's Trio and get him a regular phone. Problem being my super busy, sole-income making husband deserves his geeky gadget and uses it very well.
The kicker is we'd look for a new phone company when our contract ran out, but my entire family is on Sprint - we get to talk for free. I talk to my mom almost every day, can't imagine the bill if we had to count minutes!
Decisions will be made next year I suppose......
Next time - work ramblings...
So, we called Bellsouth, cut off the caller ID, call waiting, and something else I can't remember. But it cut the bill down by $35 a month....This is just exciting news in this house.
Then, we got to Sprint, to see about that bill....Come to find out we can't reduce our bill. In fact, when our service runs out we will be forced into a 'bundle package' that will increase our bill. "Bundling" is suppose to SAVE money!!!!! Our only option is to get rid of Rich's Trio and get him a regular phone. Problem being my super busy, sole-income making husband deserves his geeky gadget and uses it very well.
The kicker is we'd look for a new phone company when our contract ran out, but my entire family is on Sprint - we get to talk for free. I talk to my mom almost every day, can't imagine the bill if we had to count minutes!
Decisions will be made next year I suppose......
Next time - work ramblings...
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Wasted
A side affect of becoming part-time working mom is the obvious household budget cuts. I must admit that in the past we didn't pay much attention to spoiled food getting thrown out or spending a little more on items. Now that money is "tight" things are a little different.
Silly, but I am giddy when we finish leftovers or the extra sauce from pizza doesn't start talking to me from the fridge, 6 weeks later....
Challenges. The cost of groceries is HIGH these days. Despite my best coupon clipping efforts finding deals some months is just tough. We are desperately trying to keep the grocery budget, including formula and diapers at $650/mth. Strategies we've employed are using 'Angel Food Ministries' to get some basic meat packages each month and I recently checked out the ALDI grocery across from the gym. I would call this a 'basics' store. Definitely useful for a quick egg, bread, and banana pickup after the gym...not my everyday store.
Next time maybe I'll discuss the financial ridiculousness of having cellphones and landlines!
Silly, but I am giddy when we finish leftovers or the extra sauce from pizza doesn't start talking to me from the fridge, 6 weeks later....
Challenges. The cost of groceries is HIGH these days. Despite my best coupon clipping efforts finding deals some months is just tough. We are desperately trying to keep the grocery budget, including formula and diapers at $650/mth. Strategies we've employed are using 'Angel Food Ministries' to get some basic meat packages each month and I recently checked out the ALDI grocery across from the gym. I would call this a 'basics' store. Definitely useful for a quick egg, bread, and banana pickup after the gym...not my everyday store.
Next time maybe I'll discuss the financial ridiculousness of having cellphones and landlines!
Thursday, September 18, 2008
She SPEAKS!
Nora has words....3 of them
"keedee" - kitty, it was her first
"dada" - of course the daddy gets all the love
"Bur" - her version of 'bird'...in reference to a stuffed parrot in her room
We are just SO amazed at how fast she's learning......
"keedee" - kitty, it was her first
"dada" - of course the daddy gets all the love
"Bur" - her version of 'bird'...in reference to a stuffed parrot in her room
We are just SO amazed at how fast she's learning......
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
So, I joined the gym.....
The gym membership was an effort to balance my life, health , and mental state!
After having Nora the post-partem weight loss was GREAT and then it came to a halt. Many of you know that I was diagnosed with PCOS(Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) back in Aug. '06. It's an evil infertility disease that doesn't let me ovulate on my own or lose weight easily. There was hope that the pregnancy would correct this hormone imbalance but NO it did not. In fact, my insulin issues came back worse. (Sigh) Back to the Dr. for drugs and blood tests.....back on Metformin + a lot more exercise to better control my sugar levels.
I was finding myself just mentally frazzled at the end of the day. After becoming a pseudo stay at home mom, I realized how much of my character and self-worth I placed in my job, salary, and career goals. Easy enough - start my own business. Somewhere between being a sister, daughter, mom , wife, and entrepreneur I lost my mind! Perfectionist by nature I should be able to do it ALL. Wrong!
Unexpected benefits of the gym....I get 'me' time and a glorious uninterrupted shower! Ok, some days the shower is the best part since Nora's not screaming on the other side of the glass shower door. Best quote I saw recently was in a book I'm reading, "I was a better mom, Before I had Kids" This book is so TRUE. It's all about the things women don't tell each other about motherhood and being a wife afterwards. How it's hard to balance everything and feel like YOURSELF at the end of the day.
So I pound away at the treadmill, elliptical, or free weights and contemplate life, dinner, our next trip, the shopping list, visualize clients yards, or just daydream. I run to take care of me, so I can be there for my family. Can't say I've seen any true physical results yet but I already feel like a better mom and wife. And I think that may be better than fitting back into my size 8 jeans.
After having Nora the post-partem weight loss was GREAT and then it came to a halt. Many of you know that I was diagnosed with PCOS(Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) back in Aug. '06. It's an evil infertility disease that doesn't let me ovulate on my own or lose weight easily. There was hope that the pregnancy would correct this hormone imbalance but NO it did not. In fact, my insulin issues came back worse. (Sigh) Back to the Dr. for drugs and blood tests.....back on Metformin + a lot more exercise to better control my sugar levels.
I was finding myself just mentally frazzled at the end of the day. After becoming a pseudo stay at home mom, I realized how much of my character and self-worth I placed in my job, salary, and career goals. Easy enough - start my own business. Somewhere between being a sister, daughter, mom , wife, and entrepreneur I lost my mind! Perfectionist by nature I should be able to do it ALL. Wrong!
Unexpected benefits of the gym....I get 'me' time and a glorious uninterrupted shower! Ok, some days the shower is the best part since Nora's not screaming on the other side of the glass shower door. Best quote I saw recently was in a book I'm reading, "I was a better mom, Before I had Kids" This book is so TRUE. It's all about the things women don't tell each other about motherhood and being a wife afterwards. How it's hard to balance everything and feel like YOURSELF at the end of the day.
So I pound away at the treadmill, elliptical, or free weights and contemplate life, dinner, our next trip, the shopping list, visualize clients yards, or just daydream. I run to take care of me, so I can be there for my family. Can't say I've seen any true physical results yet but I already feel like a better mom and wife. And I think that may be better than fitting back into my size 8 jeans.
Maybe....
In the past I just havent' been able to keep up with these things but MAYBE this time it will get addictive.
Rich and I have long since talked about starting a blog with this title. This was a popular saying in the household when Nora first arrived..."I heard scary sounds from the underpants" It's been shortened to 'pants' these days but still brings a smile or laughter from both of us.
Of course, I don't anticipate this whole blog being about Nora and her adventures...as we have many of our own.
Rich and I have long since talked about starting a blog with this title. This was a popular saying in the household when Nora first arrived..."I heard scary sounds from the underpants" It's been shortened to 'pants' these days but still brings a smile or laughter from both of us.
Of course, I don't anticipate this whole blog being about Nora and her adventures...as we have many of our own.
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
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