The Start of the Journey

Met with the Hemo.  Little crazy being in a Cancer Research Center, but I processed it.  Had some nice EARLY morning conversation with other female patients in the waiting room.  They said I looked to young to be there and they hoped it wasn't ''anything serious''.  I didn't disclose the reason I was there.

Had ANOTHER nurse misguess how much I weigh and then tell me ''you must be all muscle, because i would have never guessed''.  Good little up moment in my day.

So the hematologist, set up my treatment plan for the coagulant problem.....good, good.  Got that one solved. She's not convinced that is my only problem.  In her words, "your symptoms are very lupussie, very MSsie."

By the way, she looks like the actress that plays the lead in ''My Big Fat Greek Wedding'' and has the same energetic, we are going to figure this out, you hang in there attitude that is contagious.  She told me, ''your story isn't over, we will fix you.''

She then proceeds to get on her cell phone and call my Rheumo and Neuro directly!  By George people, why can't I get service like this all the time!  Ten minutes of doctor to doctor phone and tada.....

I get to have a spinal tap!  Yeah me!   Truth be told, it's the only way to definitely rule out MS.  My understanding is that MS puts a specific cellular debris in the spinal fluid.  That is what they are looking for.  After having two epi's with my kiddos this should be cake.

I am unusually calm about all this.  Maybe it's because we've finally hit the end of the line.   There will be a diagnoses soon, I will have my journey's starting point.

This morning I told myself to feel lucky.  Lucky, that today I felt well enough to get out of bed, clean my house, play with my kids.  There is a big part of me that is still scared and worried, but the calm is breaking through.

One day at a time.  One day at a time.