There are some things that must come inherently to men, right from the get go.
All boys will lead with thier heads, succumbing to many more cranial bruising than sisters ever did. The parents should start questioning possible deduction of IQ points based on the multiple traumas per hour.
The toilet should be worshiped, splash in, and drummed on when we find it shut. Be sure to scream with rage over this injustice. Bonus points if there's a new roll of toilet paper to unfoil, your older sibling forgot to flush, AND the lid was left up.
Obsession over electrical devices will start early. The siren call of a purring blowdryer is a little man's best friend, play with this machine whenever possible.
Definitely, sucker mommy at all times for more snuggles. Milk every sob for all it's worth.
You are male, this means you can poop with the best of them. Astounding sounds, sizes and colors are expected.
Get dirty. Head to toe coverage in food, dirt, poo, pee, milk, and other creative substances is appreciated.
Trucks and cars make the noise 'vrmmmmm'. As a male, you will know and master this sound as one of the first three words. Without anyone telling you how to make this sound.
Flirting. Learn early.
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